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Couples Question Game: 120 questions, one tap

Imagine still finding something new to ask after thirty years together. Choose a deck, draw a question, take turns answering. Light, Deep, Future and Spicy 18+, thirty questions each.

Older couple under a shared blanket on a balcony laughing at a question on his phone, mugs on a small table
Thirty-one years married. Still asking.

What is a couples question game?

A couples question game is a deck of prompts two partners take turns answering, from easy icebreakers to questions about fears, plans and desire. The point is not to win: each answer tells your partner something new, and a good deck climbs slowly so nobody gets ambushed by a heavy question in round one.

This one runs in your browser with four decks of thirty questions. Pick a deck that fits the evening, draw, answer, then pass the phone.

Draw a question

Ready?

Choose a deck and tap Draw. Without JavaScript, every question is listed below.

Both of you answer the same question, then swap who draws.

How do you play the couples question game?

You play the couples question game by drawing one question, letting both partners answer it, and swapping who draws after every round. There is no score and no winner: the point is the conversation that follows each answer. Three habits make those answers better.

  1. Start Light, even if you have been together for years. Warm-up questions get you both talking before the Deep deck asks for more.
  2. Ask one follow-up. "Why that one?" turns a short answer into the story behind it.
  3. Skip without explaining. Any question can be passed. You can come back to it another night.

Twenty to thirty questions fill a relaxed evening. On a video call, one of you shares the screen and you both answer out loud.

Couple lying on a bed smiling at a question on her phone

All 120 questions for couples

The same questions the game draws from, grouped by deck. Light and Future work on almost any date, Deep is best when you have an hour and no phones, Spicy is for consenting adults.

Light and fun

  1. What food will you defend to the end even though everyone else hates it?
  2. If our life were a sitcom, what would the theme song be?
  3. Which fictional character would you most like to have dinner with?
  4. What is your most useless talent?
  5. Beach, mountains or a city break?
  6. What would you do with a surprise day off tomorrow?
  7. What is the best gift you have ever received?
  8. Which app on your phone do you open far too often?
  9. What was your first job, and what did it teach you?
  10. Which movie can you quote almost from start to finish?
  11. If you could be famous for one thing, what would it be?
  12. Which smell takes you straight back to childhood?
  13. Early bird or night owl, and have you always been one?
  14. What is the strangest thing you believed as a kid?
  15. What would your last meal be, starter to dessert?
  16. Which decade would you time-travel to for a week?
  17. What would you buy just for fun if money were no object?
  18. What is the best concert or show you have ever been to?
  19. Which household chore do you secretly not mind?
  20. What hobby would you pick up if you had the time?
  21. Cats, dogs or neither, and why?
  22. What is the most spontaneous thing you have ever done?
  23. Which song do you always sing along to in the car?
  24. What word do you use too much?
  25. What is the best advice you ignored?
  26. If you had to teach a class, what would it be on?
  27. What is your karaoke song, or the one you would never sing?
  28. Which small luxury makes an ordinary day better?
  29. What is the funniest thing that happened to you this year?
  30. Which three emojis sum up your week?

Deep

  1. What have you changed your mind about in the last few years?
  2. When do you feel most like yourself?
  3. What fear have you never really said out loud?
  4. Which childhood memory shaped you the most?
  5. What does a perfect ordinary day look like for you?
  6. What do you wish people asked you about more often?
  7. How do you know you need a break before I notice?
  8. What compliment would mean a lot coming from me?
  9. What is the hardest thing you have ever forgiven?
  10. Which part of your life are you proudest of so far?
  11. What does feeling loved look like to you in a normal week?
  12. What would you tell your younger self?
  13. Which friendship taught you the most about relationships?
  14. What do you need from me when you are stressed but not saying so?
  15. Which belief from your family have you kept, and which have you dropped?
  16. When did you last cry, and would you like to talk about it?
  17. Which dream did you give up on, and do you miss it?
  18. What makes you feel respected?
  19. What are you still learning about yourself?
  20. What kind thing have you done that nobody knows about?
  21. How has our relationship changed you, for better or worse?
  22. Which argument pattern of ours would you like to break?
  23. What are we really good at as a team?
  24. What would you want to be remembered for?
  25. What question are you afraid to ask me?
  26. Which of your needs is hardest to put into words?
  27. What moment made you trust me?
  28. What have you never told anyone about your first love?
  29. When do you feel lonely, even when you are not alone?
  30. What would make this a good year for us?

Future and us

  1. Where do you picture us living in five years?
  2. Which trip do we have to take together before we get old?
  3. What does a good Sunday look like when we are eighty?
  4. Which skill should we learn together?
  5. How do you want to celebrate our next anniversary?
  6. Which tradition from your family would you like to keep?
  7. City, suburbs or countryside, long term?
  8. Which money goal should we set together?
  9. How many nights a week should be just ours, no plans and no people?
  10. What would our dream home need to have?
  11. Do you want a pet in the next few years, and what kind?
  12. What should we do more of this year, and less of?
  13. Which challenge would you like us to take on together?
  14. How do you want us to make big decisions?
  15. What would a perfect holiday season look like for us?
  16. Which couple you know would you like us to be like, and why?
  17. What would you like to try for the first time with me?
  18. What should our house rules be?
  19. How should we split the chores so it feels fair?
  20. Where would you spend a whole month off?
  21. What is one thing we should stop doing as a couple?
  22. What will being a good partner mean to you in ten years?
  23. How should we handle time with each other's families?
  24. Which date should we put in the calendar right now?
  25. What would you like us to be known for as a couple?
  26. What promise would you like us to make each other this year?
  27. Which small habit would make our weeks better?
  28. If we wrote a bucket list tonight, what goes first?
  29. How will we know we are doing well a year from now?
  30. What do you want our story to sound like when we tell it?

Spicy (18+)

  1. What is the first thing you would do if we had the house to ourselves all weekend?
  2. Which kiss of ours do you still think about?
  3. What would you like to try but feel shy asking for?
  4. Which of my outfits drives you a little crazy?
  5. What is your favourite way to be touched when we are not in bed?
  6. Where is the riskiest place you would want to kiss me?
  7. Which fantasy would you like to talk about first, just talk?
  8. When do you feel most desired by me?
  9. What is the sexiest thing about the way I talk?
  10. What would you like more of in our intimate life?
  11. What turns you off faster than anything else?
  12. Slow and teasing, or fast and spontaneous?
  13. What is the most romantic setting you can imagine for a night together?
  14. What did I do once that you would love me to do again?
  15. What is your favourite memory of a night we stayed in?
  16. What would go on a yes, no and maybe list with me?
  17. Which message would you love to wake up to from me?
  18. Which boundary makes you feel safer to explore?
  19. Which song would you pick for a slow dance that turns into something more?
  20. Which compliment about your body would you like to hear more often?
  21. Morning or night, and why?
  22. What is the boldest thing you have wanted to say to me in public?
  23. What always gets you in the mood?
  24. Which part of foreplay do you wish lasted longer?
  25. Which role would you like to play for one night?
  26. What would you do if I kissed you right now, mid-game?
  27. What would you like me to take the lead on?
  28. What is the best way to tell you I am in the mood?
  29. Which scent or sound reminds you of us in bed?
  30. What would you like to try before the year is over?

Couples question games: what people ask

What is the 36 questions game for couples?

The 36 questions game comes from a 1997 study by psychologist Arthur Aron and colleagues: pairs of strangers spent 45 minutes on 36 questions that grew more personal set by set, and they reported feeling closer than pairs who made small talk (Aron et al., 1997).

Our Deep deck follows the same idea of escalating gently rather than jumping straight to the heavy questions.

What is the 20 questions game for couples?

The 20 questions game for couples is a guessing game: one partner thinks of a person, place or moment from your relationship and the other gets twenty yes or no questions to name it. It is a good warm-up before this deck, because it gets you both remembering shared moments.

What is the 7-7-7 rule for couples?

The 7-7-7 rule is a popular rule of thumb, not research: a date every 7 days, a night away every 7 weeks and a holiday every 7 months. A question game fits the weekly date part of it, because it turns a night in into an actual date.

What are some juicy questions to ask your partner?

Juicy questions for your partner are playful but personal, for example "Which of my outfits drives you a little crazy?" or "What would go on a yes, no and maybe list with me?" The Spicy deck above has thirty of them for couples who are both in the mood.

How is this different from a couples question card game?

This free game gives you the questions; a physical deck adds the ritual of drawing cards across the table. If you want that, compare the best decks in our guide to question games for couples, or see Loopy, the card game we make ourselves.

From the blog

More question ideas from our blog

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